This week we’re writing about what advice has stuck with us for a long time, and who gave us that advice.
Nothing was ever sugar-coated for me as a child. My mother Dot, with her typical East End tell-it-like-it-is attitude, drummed the following advice into me from a very early age:
‘Never get old and fat, because first you’ll see ’em with one stick, then you’ll see ’em with two sticks, and then you won’t see ’em at all, so everything in moderation.’
As a child this always gave me a terrible mental image of an unfortunate whale-like, wrinkled person stuck and floundering in an armchair like a flapping fish.
Up until the age of about 12 or 13 when I was given pocket money, sweets were rationed to one small bag on Saturdays only. If Dot saw me trying to take more than 3 biscuits, then the tin would be quickly whipped away and my protestations would be ignored. Vegetables were always put on my plate and I would be expected to eat some whether I liked them or not, but by the time I reached late teen age I was eating everything put in front of me; vegetables, liver and onions, stews, casseroles, and boiled fish to name but a few.
Now I’m nearly sixty I finally get what she was trying to teach me. I’m thankfully still mobile, and am glad she gave me the advice. Both our granddaughters are overweight, and when we recently paid an unannounced flying visit to drop something off, both of them were sitting in front of the TV, each chomping on their own large mixing-bowl full of crisps and sweets. We were horrified and wondered if this was a regular occurrence, but could say nothing. The youngest granddaughter complains that her legs hurt and chafe if she walks too far. I can see diabetes, heart disease and early-onset arthritis waiting in the wings ready to pounce in the future. Somebody ought to take those mixing bowls away… I’m sure Dot would if she could!
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Stevie Turner 
Both my daughters-in-law are size 22, but thankfully my grandsons are a normal weight. However, both granddaughters are too heavy, but there’s nothing I can do about it and that’s what hurts. Yes I’m feeling a lot better now. Thanks Debby. x
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Certainly obesity in this day and age is attributed to fast food, junk foods that never existed decades ago and not enough activity. It’s the parent’s role to make sure this area of health is supervised. For sure Dot would have much to say. 🙂
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My daughter-in-law gives her children the kind of food she had as a child, and the foods she likes to eat herself. She grew up in a family of overweight people so to her it’s all normal.
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It’s frightening. I see my niece doing same with her daughter who is 5 and still small, but my niece is size 22! I don’t know why parents find it too easy to give kids starchy, sugary carbs to pacifiy them and bread galore and macaroni and cheese out of the ying yang. They should make the time to feed them healthy things. 🙂 Hope you’re feeling good now Stevie. x
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I’m a fan of moderation. Some sweets are okay. Some TV is okay. But there have to be limits, and kids can learn that at a very young age.
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Yes that’s true. Up until the time I ate biscuits (about 10 years ago) I could still only take 3 at any one time!
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Reblogged this on aurorawatcherak.
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Thanks for the re-blog.
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I think there are limits to the whole “keep your advice to yourself” rule. You don’t want to be bossy about it, but one or the other of you ought to talk to your son if your daughter-in-law is touchy. Of course, here in the US, Child Protective Services in some communities will intervene and that’s not something anyone wants in their lives.
Our son went through a period when he was a 6th grader where he was overweight. It’s actually considered by child advocates here in the States to be abuse to deny television or to send your kids outside to play in winter temperatures (rolling my eyes), but we did it anyway. I’m a “mean”, old-fashioned mom. There are some things my mother had right and that’s one area. He stayed active enough that he had general fitness and in Middle School, he started growing taller and the weight stretched out. Then he was on the swim team and now rock climbing … he actually weights a little bit less than is “optimum” for his height at 18 and, boy, is he ripped! Are moms allowed to say that about their sons?
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Our son is aware of the problem, but he’s out working long hours and our daughter-in-law rules in the kitchen. All I can hope is that when the girls become adults they gain the motivation to keep their weight under control.
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It’s so often we realize so much later what our parents/grandparents were trying to teach us and how valuable it would be.
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It comes at a time when we get to the same age as our grandparents were back then!
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I wonder why you feel unable to say anything to your children about the way they are spoiling theirs?
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As the mother-in-law, I don’t think it would go over very well. That MIL/DIL relationship is very touchy!
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Too right!
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That’s easy – it would cause a family rift which I do not want. A mother-in-law has to shut up!
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Exactly!!
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Daughters-in-law do not take kindly to their mothers-in-law telling them how to bring up their children. They usually only take advice from their own mothers. The parents of my daughter-in-law are both very overweight. Hmm…
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Rationing sweets by our parents was very wise. I see similar poor eating habits with our grandsons and worry for them. Great advice from your mother. The best advice I got was from my father who said to always look for the good in everyone you meet. It has fared me well.
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The amount of sugar our young people are consuming is definitely very worrying.
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