I was quite surprised on Tuesday to read how mothers should not use wet wipes on a baby’s skin, as the chemicals embedded in a wipe can cause some over-sensitive babies to develop allergies such as eczema. I only remember using good old-fashioned soap, water, and cotton wool or a soft flannel when my own two sons were babies, but when I was pregnant back in 1982, people who had been there and done it already were full of advice about what I should or shouldn’t do regarding baby and child care. I listened to them all and to my health visitor who of course had much to say on the topic, but interestingly enough she’d had no children of her own.
I’ll give some explanations below as to the advice I followed 35 years’ ago, and how it had changed by the time my first grandchild was born in 2005.
1. Always lay a baby on its front or its side to go to sleep, never on its back.
I followed this advice religiously, afraid that my two sons might vomit and choke to death if they were laid flat on their backs. Now the advice is always to lay a baby on its back and never on its front!
2. If your baby has colic, see your GP who will prescribe Merbentyl Syrup.
This was the advice I was given back in 1982 when Leon, furious with his milk-only diet and with tiny hands balled into fists and little legs drawn up in pain, screamed night and day. Merbentyl Syrup certainly eased the poor sod’s pain. However, when I mentioned it to my daughters-in-law, they had never heard of it. I found out that it was now not recommended and had been discontinued.
3. Start weaning babies onto solid food at 4 months.
My sons were ready for rusks and pureed fruit at 4 months and gobbled everything down gratefully. Now mothers are told not to wean until 6 months. Still, this has to be better than when my grandmother had given birth to her first baby back in 1926. She’d been given no advice at all, and had to take her newborn to Bethnal Green hospital after trying to feed him a large saveloy and a plate of pease pudding!
4. Give only boiled water after 6 months if they wake in the night.
My health visitor told me this when I mentioned that we were getting no sleep. She told me that Leon was becoming ‘crafty’ and knew that if he screamed I would come running. Apparently if you only gave babies water during the night they would soon realise they were not going to get fed and go back to sleep. It was at this point I asked her if she’d had any babies of her own (the answer was negative). After 6 months you are desperate for sleep, and you know that water isn’t going to soothe a hungry baby screaming for food at 3 am!
My daughters-in-law were told to feed on demand day and night. Neither of them got any sleep until their babies were at least 3 years old.
5. Give boiled water in-between feeds.
Of course! It makes sense, especially on a hot day, as babies are humans too and are made up of about 60% water. I always carried bottles of cooled boiled water around with me for my babies. However, my daughters-in-law were told not to give water in-between feeds, as it would dilute their milk (they breast-fed). I never breast-fed, but still can’t get my head around the advice not to give a baby anything to drink in-between feeds.
6. Toilet train at 2 years old.
This works very well actually (you won’t get much of a result before the age of 2). You pick a few weeks in the summer and let the infant run around in the garden with nothing on its lower half, while you watch them like a hawk with a poe in your hand, ready to sit them down on it at the crucial moment. They soon get the hang of it. However, my daughters-in-law used ‘trainer pants’ and the ordeal went on for months. The kids thought they had nappies on and couldn’t feel the unpleasant sensation of urine running down their legs (girls) or seeing themselves pee (boys). One granddaughter was over 3 years old before she was toilet trained!
Strange, isn’t it, how advice changes over the years! If you’ve had babies, what advice were you given as a new parent?
Even in the span of my first child to my most recent, there have been changes in advice.
One change was that of encouraging breastfeeding so much more these days, such that they will not supplement with Formula without asking nor will they encourage a pacifier (for the first month) or sugar-water when giving shots.
Of course, no nurse stopped me from anything in the hospital with the exception of strongly suggesting I consider Formula to increase weight gain since I delivered early -because I’ve had several babies.
…..
Another note I thought of was baby aspirin. That’s a HUGE no-no. An aunt suggested it for a cousin’s baby recently and everyone set her straight.
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I had no intention of ever breastfeeding, and both my sons are healthy, strapping men.
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I had my sons in 2003 and 2006, respectively, Stevie. I was given much of the same advice you describe above. I was told to only start solids at 6 months but ignored that advice in favour of my Mother’s four month view. My boys were both over 3.5 kg at birth (2 weeks early as I had to have Cesarean births) and they both gained 1 kg in the first 2 weeks. Breast milk was not going to do it alone for six months.
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You’re right – just milk until 6 months is not good, as the baby will tell you in the only way it knows how! By then the baby is too big and needs some solid food.
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Seems everything changes with time. Often what was good is now bad and vice versa lol. 🙂
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Too true.
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🙂
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You didn’t even touch on car seats! How did we ever survive?
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Goodness knows. My boys bounced around in the back seat and played thumb wars.
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😀😀😀
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79, 82 and 85 – I recognise most of these – my bible was ‘Doctor Hugh Jolly’s Book of Childcare’ and forunately his advice to have your children in bed with you worked for our breastfed babies who needed little sleep ( which has correctly proved to be a sign of great intelligence! ) and by the second one I had developed the art of feeding lying down without opening my eyes – I think young babies in bed are disapproved of now, but the jury is still out on nurseries or all cosy together.. Anyway – guess what our two families are totally different! Daughter-in-law bottle and strict routine, bed early, while daughter glad of my encouragement to breast feed toddlers and no routine. She’s just had her second. Of course we all discover most children grow up pretty normal despite what we did or didn’t do!
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You make me think of Philip Larkin’s poem about how parents f**k us up! I was of the same ilk as your daughter-in-law – bottle and strict routine.
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they have to keep changing the advice or Mum would know best 🙂
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My daughter was so long ago my wife and I were told not to feed her raw dinosaur or pteradactyl eggs.Things had changed a lot by the time our daughter presented me with grandchildren 4 years ago and 2 years ago. I haven’t seen any gripe water yet.
xxx Huge Hugs xxx
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No I think the gripe water is long gone unfortunately.
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If I remember correctly it was 30% proof
Ah yes, from Wiki “Gripe water was invented in 1851 by William Woodward, an English pharmacist who did his apprenticeship in Lincolnshire and later bought a business in Nottingham.[5] Gripe water was adopted as a prescription by physicians.[6] In the 1840s, babies in Eastern England were afflicted by a condition known as “fen fever”, and during that time there was also an outbreak of malaria in England. Woodward took his inspiration from the treatments for malaria and “fen fever”. He noted that the formula used to treat fen fever was an effective “soother of fretful babies and provided relief from gastrointestinal troubles in infants.” The original Woodward’s Gripe Water contained 3.6% alcohol, dill oil, sodium bicarbonate, sugar, and water. Woodward registered “Gripe Water” as a trademark in 1876.”
I remember it as being quite pleasant and it has over the years provided solace to many a harassed Mum 🙂
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I was brought up on Collis Brown’s Chlorodyne, which contains extract of opium! Mum didn’t know I was dairy intolerant and found that this stuff soothed my torturous innards. I must have spent much of my childhood stoned …
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all very 1960s 🙂
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We still take it now for coughs and stomach upsets, and so do my sons. When I was a kid Mum would drip 30 drops into hot water, but now it’s so diluted you can take it by the spoonful. My friend who works in a chemist’s tells me that addicts go from shop to shop buying it up and that when she gives it to a customer she has to shake the bottle because otherwise addicts drink the top part only which is the most potent!
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As a child I had problems with coughing at night when lying in bed, and the doctor at the time prescribed something that the chemist made up for him
Anyway some years later I needed the same medicine so I went into the chemists with an old bottle of it with some dregs left in the bottom. He sniffed it, smiled and said, “We’re not allowed to sell this stuff any more” 🙂
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It was probably Collis Brown’s mixture!
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worked better than hot water with whiskey and honey 🙂
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