I followed On the Couch‘s blog, and I read an interesting post by Karen Nimmo on the 8 regrets of middle age:
https://www.medium.com/on-the-couch/the-top-8-regrets-of-middle-age/9b68abfdc2aa
Out of the 8 my biggest regret is not going to University to study English. It would have suited me better rather than the path I took when I was 18. Apparently ‘people like me‘ didn’t go to University (did I have three heads then?) and I was actively encouraged to go out and get a job… any job.
My next biggest regret is not having a third child. Leon was such a handful for the first 15 years of his life, that at the time I couldn’t have considered looking after any more, other than the two I already had. Still, they’ve presented me with 4 lovely grandchildren (I’ll have 5 at the end of July) and therefore who could ask for more?
The next one is not taking the opportunity to further my musical knowledge. When I was 11 I started at a grammar school that focused on academic subjects and had next to no musical tuition. My violin teacher from my primary school made a special pilgrimage to my grammar school to teach just myself. Of course all the other kids made faces through the window, as my violin lessons were always at lunchtimes. I became terribly embarrassed and gave it up. Now 51 years later I would have stuck a finger up at them and carried on. Sorry Mr Kilburn (if you’re still alive) for wasting your time.
I think the majority of people have regrets, and those are mine. What’s yours? Thanks to Karen Nimmo for her thought-provoking post.
Clipping World said:
Why should I regret for what I am doing now with full passion? If I am messing with my life that is my wish right now. If it brings something bad in future I will face that without regreting my old bullshit.
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Stevie Turner said:
Fair enough.
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K.L. Hale said:
Great post and question. I try not to have “regrets”. But let’s face it. We do. I would have pursued my music passion more~and of course, writing. But time was not on my side with my career and raising my boys. But I’m still young and pursuing those things I’ve developed over the years. Take care!
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Stevie Turner said:
Thanks for your comment. Yes, when my boys left home I had more time to write novels and so I did!
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K.L. Hale said:
Good for you! You inspire me!
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dgkaye said:
Loved this Stevie. Arg, regrets, I’d rather not look back and my shoulda woulda couldas. I was a singer, you played violin, go figure! LOL 🙂 xx
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Stevie Turner said:
The best thing is to be young and know what we know now, lol.
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dgkaye said:
My favorite saying – Hindsight is always 20/20
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Stevie Turner said:
Oh yes…
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Phil Huston said:
Oh dear. Cigarettes. I quit years ago, but still. Waste of time and money. Hindsight is easy. I shouldn’t have quit college because I was pissed off. I’m sure there’s value in drudgery and rote, but it was lost on me at the time. We are the summary of who we’ve been and we can’t rewrite history. I was stupid and insensitive and selfish and young. I tripped over a dream and off I went. I followed it, didn’t chart it. I should have saved more money, been slower with my middle finger, been wiser about people and their machinations. Should have sought out what made my heart hurt, should have forgiven my mother and heard her side of it before she died, should never have yelled at a dumb dog for being a dumb dog. Should have worked at the piano instead of letting it take me away on a magic carpet ride every time I put my hands on it. But then the Jay Gatsby way wasn’t mine and sometimes when I hear the stories of friends from my youth who played it straight I feel guilty. Yeah, it was hard, but I had a hell of a lot of fun in the gaps between business and music and learned things about the cosmic radio many miss out on. Think I can hit the Burger King from here with Van Halen? That was true story.
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Stevie Turner said:
If only we could go back and put it all right. Ha ha, we wouldn’t though because we’d be young again…
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Phil Huston said:
God forbid. I see young couples with babies and cringe. No way. Yeah they have hair and 5% body fat but noooo way.
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Stevie Turner said:
I agree. Looking after a hyperactive child was ‘challenging’ to say the least!
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Clive said:
Sadly, I just got the dreaded 404 message from the link, so I don’t know what the other regrets are. I was lucky enough to study Eng Lit at uni so I can’t claim that one, but given my love of music my biggest regret is that I had no talent for it: they even gave up on teaching me the recorder!
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Stevie Turner said:
I’m very musical, as is my youngest son. He was lucky to find a brilliant guitar teacher. I would certainly not turn poor old Mr Kilburn away these days, but sadly he’s probably no longer with us anyway.
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Clive said:
You’re very lucky to have that ability in the family. My older daughter reached grade 8 on violin and also got several grades in piano and music theory. No idea where she got it from. Must have had a musical milkman 😉
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Stevie Turner said:
Lol. My mum played the piano until she was 90. Every day as a kid she sat me down to listen to classical music for half an hour or so. A good education, but I didn’t appreciate it at the time.
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Clive said:
So often the way – we appreciate things when it’s too late!
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Stevie Turner said:
Yep.
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Phil Huston said:
Would that be the plastic clarinetish thing or the tape recorder? Because I knew a girl one time who was so musically challenged she could hardly play the radio.
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Clive said:
I’m with her!
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Stevie Turner said:
School kids in the UK all learn to play the recorder, the plastic whistling thing that sounds like a thousand tomcats.
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Phil Huston said:
Yep. Almost as torturous as beginning violin!
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Stevie Turner said:
I remember sawing away one evening at home, and then the next morning being informed that my dad had accidentally trodden on the violin and broken the bridge. I often wonder if it was an accident, lol.
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Phil Huston said:
🤣🤣🤣
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